About me

Me with my boys 2011

I don’t have a PHD in Infertility but if there was a Tshirt going I think I have earned it! Mummy to six year old Zac and now mummy also to twins Anya Elizabeth Rose and Xavier Andrew, I now finally, fortunately feel my life is complete. And yet, the experience of trying for our second (and as it happened third!) child created another need in me and that was to reach out and tell our story, share our experiences and reassure other couples that it is OK to want another child, you’re not being greedy and you should not feel guilty.

Originally from Lancashire, I now live in the Yorkshire Wolds with my husband Jason and I am delighted to say, our wonderful three children who have inspired so much in me. Zac who is mentioned so often in the book and our miracle babies Anya and Xavi who were born in 2017.

I started writing my book in 2011 during the first round of IVF.  Four rounds, £20,000 spent and  two babies born later, I completed the book in 2014.  I tried a number of publishers before one particular one said: “we love the book and think you’d be great to work with, it’s just we can’t commission because nobody searches for ‘Secondary Infertility’ on Amazon and we don’t think there is a market for this book.”

That comment lit a touch paper in me I never knew existing and I spent the next 2 years trying to raise the profile of the term ‘Secondary Infertility’ and all it’s complexities.  I had four rounds of IVF and spent £20k and nobody even mentioned that term to me – so of course others like me wouldn’t search Amazon for this unknown term!

In 2017, I finally published the book myself.  There has been a tremendous response from all over the world and I remain committed to my mission to raise the profile of the condition, it’s name and all the painful complexities.

More Love To Give is my story, but it’s only the start, this is really the story of Secondary Infertility.

I now run the support website www.secondaryinfertilitymatters.com a FB page and Group of the same name and regularly speak on the subject.

You can buy a copy here.  Enjoy.

Helen x

Team Davies Summer 2014

All content property of Helen Davies. Copyright 2014

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One thought on “About me

  1. Darlene

    I haven’t read your book or blog yet but I wanted to say thank you. I married late and started trying to get pregnant at 38. I was referred to a fertility specialist after I suffered 2 miscarriages. I was diagnosed with unexplained infertility. I started ivf and after what was looking like a big fail I became pregnant with twins about a month after I turned 39. Like you I delivered my twins early at 28 weeks. It’s hard to put into words how amazingly happy I have been raising these now 5 year old twins. I used to say that my becoming a physician was the best decision I ever made but now it’s the second best (sorry to the hubby!). I feel such an intense love for my boys and know now what I was missing. My mother was an alcoholic with psychiatric issues and without saying more I’m sure you can imagine what my life was like being raised in that environment.

    After I had my twins I became pregnant again two more times at 40 and 41 and lost both pregnancies. At 43 I did another round of ivf and could only transfer 1 embryo which didn’t take. I’m now 45 and still trying to get pregnant naturally (no ivf clinic will take me I’m sure!). I like you have so much more love to give and for admittedly selfish reasons I would love to be given the chance to do this again one more time. I struggle against two things. Initially it was me not being “thankful” that I had not only 1 child but a set of twins. Now I hear that in addition to something along the lines of I’m too old to conceive and that coupled with my past fertility issues a successful pregnancy at my age is impossible anyway and so all the more reason to be thankful for what I have and accept that they were my first and last. After all I could be 45 and childless. Well I know myself and at 80 I’m sure I’ll be looking for a miracle ha ha but again I really want to say thank you for acknowledging/empathizing with/sharing your story/providing a place to talk about secondary infertility.

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